By Shunxin, Thailand

Finding a Close Friend Abroad, a Wonderful Helper for Starting a Business From Scratch

When I first came abroad I had a really hard time, but I later met someone who became a really close friend. She was wonderful to me—not only did she help me with things in daily life, but would often lend me money as well. We got along just like sisters. I was incredibly grateful for her help and hoped that I would be able to return the kindness someday.

Later on we started up an online business together; I registered WeChat shop in my own name. I took responsibility for finding customers, while she took responsibility for purchasing and shipping, with equal sharing of profits. A year later we started a direct sales business so that we could make more money. In an effort to get customers to buy factory-direct products and so we could earn more points on WeChat, we took a portion of our own profit and returned it to customers as a rebate. Since our monthly profits on direct sales were pretty impressive, I discussed with my friend the possibility of not splitting up the remaining profits from the WeChat shop right away, but having her manage them for the time being. I had a lot of trust in her, so she had been in charge of the accounts all along and I didn’t know for sure how much was left in profit every month. A year on we were working together really happily and we had more and more customers—we had gone from a customer base of 600 to nearly 5,000, plus we had an excellent 5-star reputation. I was very pleased to see our business growing by the day, but I was even happier to have such a close friend.

The Boat of Friendship Is Rocked by the Waves of Self-interest

But all good things must come to an end. As business got better and better, I started to get a vague sense that there was a barrier growing between us. Apart from business communications, she was either wittingly or unwittingly distancing herself from me in general. Once I accidentally caught sight of an invoice that had two brand-name watches on it, but they weren’t products that we sold in our store. When I asked her about it she hemmed and hawed, and explained it away as something she was buying for her sister. I didn’t think much of it at the time. But that kind of thing started happening more and more, and I realized that she was hogging profits behind my back. This made me really angry and I wanted to clear it up with her, but then I thought about how much she had helped me in the past and I didn’t want to destroy our friendship over a bit of money. I decided to turn a blind eye and not bring it up.

However, my friend didn’t rein herself in because of my trust and tolerance. After that I discovered that she was becoming less and less responsible with the business, sometimes sending out the wrong product or mailing things to the wrong address, leading to complaint after complaint from customers. I tried talking to her about this issue, but she just continued on as before. Then one day we were idly chatting and she mentioned that she wanted us to conduct business separately but was reticent to say so—that’s the reason she was intentionally doing things that way. I was really hurt. People say that you should never mix business and personal affairs, that in the face of personal gain people will always forsake their principles, and it will lead to a rift. I didn’t want things to get to that point with her, so I pulled out of the store and handed it all over to her.

Facing Hard Times, I Get the Cold Shoulder When I Ask Her for Help

Not long after that I left town with my husband on business. In order to maintain the friendship between us, I introduced over 20 new customers to her, one after another. She responded to me really indifferently—this was incredibly disappointing and hurtful to me. We weren’t in contact after that as both of us were busy with our own businesses.

My husband’s business ended up failing and we fell on hard times financially. We were even struggling to meet our daily food needs. As we were approaching desperation I thought of the yearly profit my friend had kept from the WeChat shop, so I wasted no time in sending her a message explaining our dire circumstances, hoping that she’d allot some of that extra profit to help me out of that bind. To my surprise, she said that she had already used that profit to give rebates to customers, so she had very little on hand. When I asked her about why she didn’t have any extra profit, she didn’t have any verification to explain it, but just coldly responded with this: “I said there’s nothing, so there’s nothing. Don’t give any more thought to profits.” Her response made me really angry and I thought, “Can money really change a person? Where did that good friend of mine go? I had so much trust in her that I even gave her the PIN number for my bank card, had her manage our WeChat store, and recommended customers to her. I was so good to her, but when I’m most in need of cash she says she has nothing. That’s so heartless.” I couldn’t help but develop resentment toward her as I thought through all of that.

Wanting to resolve our household financial crisis as soon as possible, I thought about the portion of customers that I still had in my hands. I wanted to snatch the WeChat store away from her and take it back over. But then I thought about how I had promised to let her run things, so wouldn’t taking it back now be a lack of integrity? But then I thought, since she’s being so unscrupulous in the face of profits, I have every right to take it back. So, I demanded that she give the store back to me and re-divide the existing customers so that she could open a store and run it on her own, and we could sell the same kinds of products. She agreed and pulled out of the store very quickly—I was really happy at the time. But to my surprise, when I took the store back my friend had entirely deleted all of the products, ads, and customer reviews I had so laboriously put into it, particularly the photos in the direct sales product listings—all of that was real customer feedback, but she had deleted all of it. Her behavior left me really angry and I really wanted to tell her off in person.

I had no choice but to start from scratch, putting up new product listings bit by bit, and then sending out messages to previous customers one by one. Things started to pick up speed after a period of hard work. But what I hadn’t expected was that after my friend started her own online shop, she set the prices on her products really low so my customers all moved over to her—it was clear she was trying to squeeze me out. I was really angry and wanted to tell all of our customers about how she had deleted all of my product listings so that they would see her true face. But just as I was on the verge of sending out that message I suddenly felt uneasy. I thought about how I’m a person of faith, and taking revenge that way wouldn’t be in line with God’s will. So, I deleted the message. In the days that followed business became slower and slower for me, and no matter what I was selling, there just wasn’t any sales volume. Whenever I saw her advertising huge sales, I was really upset and thought of all the ways she had wronged me. I was full of resentment toward her, and I would get so angry that I couldn’t stop shaking. For a period of time I lost my appetite, I couldn’t sleep, and sometimes I couldn’t quiet myself in gatherings. I started thinking again about sending a message to tell everyone about her behavior, but I knew I shouldn’t do that. I was really in pain and at a loss—all I could do was keep praying to God.

One day, I saw these words of God, “Cruel mankind! The connivance and intrigue, the snatching and grabbing one from another, the scramble for fame and fortune, the mutual slaughter—when will it ever end? Despite the hundreds of thousands of words God has spoken, no one has come to their senses. People act for the sake of their families, sons and daughters, for their careers, future prospects, position, vainglory, and money, for the sake of food, clothing, and the flesh. But is there anyone whose actions are truly for the sake of God?” I really felt ashamed after reading this; I felt that I had been constantly struggling with her over personal benefit and had acted with malice. I didn’t have a sense of friendship—I saw that I really have been so deeply corrupted by Satan. I thought about how my friend doesn’t believe in God, so her acting like that is understandable, but I’m a believer and had been fighting for profit just like her, constantly on edge and frustrated over it. I wasn’t even interested in gatherings and wanted to go have it out with her. What I had been living out really was an ugly, satanic face—it really brought shame to God.

I then thought of the words of the Lord Jesus, “Again, the kingdom of heaven is like to treasure hid in a field; the which when a man has found, he hides, and for joy thereof goes and sells all that he has, and buys that field” (Matthew 13:44). It’s true. The kingdom of heaven is where God reigns, and only those who possess the truth can enter into it. The truth is a priceless treasure—only those who eschew all financial benefit and focus on seeking the truth are intelligent people. I thought about how, since I’m a believer now, I have a chance at getting into the kingdom of heaven but I was still stubbornly clinging to financial interests to the point that I was living within resentment for the sake of my own benefit. I didn’t feel like reading God’s words or attending gatherings, and I hadn’t been seeking the truth to resolve my own problems—that’s so foolish and ignorant! I gave thanks to God’s words for their enlightenment and guidance, and I no longer wanted to keep struggling, but instead to seek the truth to resolve my own corrupt disposition. I got online and got in touch with Sister Li, told her the entire story, and asked for her help.

To Be Continued …